Conference Weekend

I love our leaders!  They don't get any cuter than this, do they??

This is one of my favorite times of the whole year.  I love fall and the crisp air that it brings!  One of my favorite things about October (excluding Halloween and the anticipation of my birthday) is when we get to watch General Conference.  I love our sweet prophet, apostles, and leaders and the wonderful words they give us.  I also love that I can watch it from the comfort of my pajamas while I snuggle the weekend away with the biggest hottie there ever was.  :)  

Sooooooo.... In honor of CONFERENCE WEEKEND this weekend I wanted to post one of my all-time favorite videos.

If you haven't already seen this, are you dying??  I've watched it so many times and I laugh harder and harder every time.  My brother Alex does THE best impression of Elder Oaks and it cracks me up.  "The Reeses Peanut Butter cup challenges us to consume..."  bahahaha!  Amen to that! 

This guy nailed their voices ON THE HEAD!  

People- this is a must watch!  

I hope you all have a relaxing weekend full of food, family, and most of all the spirit.  If you do not have a TV watch Conference online at lds.org.  It'll change your life. There are sessions at 10am and 2pm both Saturday and Sunday and Priesthood session for men on Saturday night at 6pm (I believe). You can also find the Young Women's broadcast online as well if you missed it.  It was truly inspired!  

Love you all! 

M 

Ear ITCHsues

Okay this is going to be a rant.  I'm just slightly feeling fussy today because I spent a BOAT LOAD of money on my ears.  My ears? you ask??? Let me tell you. 

I hate my ears.  About 3 years ago I started to get really itchy ears.  Like SO crazy itchy.  Not just in the ear hole (for lack of a more sophisticated word), but all the way down almost to my throat.  It started in just one ear and about a year later it began in both. THE most tremendous itching you have ever felt in your whole life.  Like when they itch it feels like I have 10 mosquito bites in each ear drum and no matter how much I poke, prob, and dig nothing makes it go away. 

It's awakened me SO many nights these past few years I thought I could die.  They get sores and cracks due to all the itching and dryness, which only makes them more itchy!  Such a vicious cycle.  I'm telling you- it has been SO miserable! 

I've tried everything.  I've researched.  I've prayed.  I've made a gazillion horrible noises with my throat that Cory hates just to try and reach the deep itch inside my ear.  I've tried all my essential oils from Doterra, coconut oil, hydrogen peroxide, deep digging with a q-tip (MAJOR NO-NO!), etc... I've even gone off of gluten and dairy to see if it was a food allergy.  I'VE TRIED EVERYTHING!!!  To no avail. 

So finally, when we were in Ohio, they got so bad that I was determined to see a specialist of sorts when I got home.  And once we got home I kept pushing it off and procrastinating until FINALLY I told Cory that I was D-U-N and I had to go to someone.  He happily agreed either out of sure sweetness or annoyance that I haven't shut up about them ever since he's known me. 

Side note, I can remember when we were dating and he was so concerned with my well-being (still is, I hope. Don't worry!) and one night we were watching a movie and he looked at me so sweetly and said, "How are your ears feeling?"  I died.  I hadn't even brought up how itchy they were, but he knew and cared so much.  Maybe he was just trying to impress me ???  Either way, love him. 

This is us when we were dating.  So young, still spry. Ignorantly blissful. 

That was my "however statement" in this post.  You know how when you write a paper and you're supposed to put like an opposing view for a small portion of it?? Well, that is my positive "however" to this post.  This is a negative post, we are not focusing on the positive here.  Make sense??

Good. 

Moving on.  Soooo......... After years of this affliction I got my wits about me and went into the Ear, Nose, and Throat place in Draper.  First of all, we have a $3000 deductible and so insurance didn't cover a thing for the hearing test and office visit.  So I initially thought we were just going to have to pay the $145 for the office visit and I was fine with that.  I said I'd pay anything just to make it go away, and I stand by that statement.  But then she said that the hearing test was mandatory and cost an extra 60 bucks.  Even then I wasn't that bugged.  I thought- $200 bucka-roozies to cure my insanity?? Done!  And Cory was fine with that too.  

Oh, and to make matters worse, the nurse weighed me.  It's like- why on earth do you have to know how much I weigh when I came in here for itchy ears?? Being the protective person that I am, I covered it so Cory couldn't see, but then, to my dismay, he snooped and watched her enter it. I coulda killed him.  Oh, and did I mention I was fully clothed and in my tall, tall leather boots.  I'm not kidding I was probably wearing close to ten pounds of clothing (at least that's what I'm telling myself).  I was ticked??? Now, does Cory's wiff not only have itchy ears, but a WEIGHT problem.  (I am not fishing.  Do not comment on this part of my post. Thanks bye.)  So that kinda put a wringer in things- like my mood.   

The doctor poked in my ears and up my nose and down my throat and the WHOLE NINE YARDS and finally concluded that I have Eczema in my ears.  Do you want to cry for me??  He said it's chronic, but that the ear drops he was prescribing me had a steroid and some oil in it to help with the crazy itch fest going on in there.  

Everything looked good, he said.  All the while I'm thinking, IT'S NOT GOOD!  FREAKING TELL ME SOMETHING IS WRONG AND THAT I'VE DAMAGED MY HEARING BECAUSE OF ALL THE Q-TIPS AND FINGERS I'VE PUT IN THERE.  TELL ME IT'S INFECTED! Please just tell me my misery hasn't been in vain.  

(Am I the most messed up person ever?) I was actually SO thrilled to hear that everything looked good.  Just give a girl some validation, would ya? Of course, it was a man doctor.  What do men know about validation anyway? :)   

When I asked him about the drops he told me that insurance companies consider it a trial medication (or something) and wouldn't cover it.  I wasn't too bummed because we're not even CLOSE to meeting our deductible anyway.  He's like, "Yeah, they're pretty expensive."  So, naturally, I asked him how much.  "Oh, I think they're about 30-40 dollars."  I'm like- oh phew.  That's not that much. I'll pay anything to get my hands on those drops.   

And let me tell you, I really did. 

We pull up to the pharmacy to retrieve my lifesavers and she's like, okay so your total is $169.blah, blah, blah.  I'm like, "Excuse me??"  I could buy SO many items of clothing with that. She's like, "Yeah, you have to meet your deductible first," and whatever.  I said, "I know!  But my doctor said it was 30-40 dollars!"  And she said, "Yeah, doctor's don't really know."  I'm dying in my car.  I'm looking to Cory like HELP!!!  I've fallen and I can't get up!  Of course, he just shrugged and said to pay it.  What choice did we have??  

Meet the drops that are making it so we will starve.  They may look benign, but they've got a lotta monies tied up in them.

I do have to say, since I put the drops in this afternoon, my ears haven't been as itchy.  

But seriously, I feel like I've been raped by the medical system.  Did I mention the bottle of drops is 20mL which isn't even 1 ounce!!!!!  

I'm enraged.  And they will only last me about a month. So let me do the math. I am paying almost $200 a month so that my ears don't itch because "I have Eczema."  Good gosh.  

"Oh, but I'm giving you 6 refills!" the doctor says.  As if I'm really wanting to spend 1200 FREAKING dollars on ear drops.  

When I said I'd pay anything to have my ears stop itching I wasn't lying.  We gave them an arm AND a leg.  

I rest my case. 

SOS. 

M

Numerology

What number are YOU???

I am a two! 

Have any of you ever heard of numerology??  It is one of our family's favorite things to talk about and for some odd reason it gives perspective into people's personalities.  I know it sounds like a hoax, but the weird thing is is that it usually is spot on!!  

A few years ago my mom and her twin sister Holly started getting into numerology and I felt validated when I found out what number I was- which is a 2. If you know me, you will see that it describes me pretty well.  Every person I know fits their number almost to a T!  

Okay, so I'm no expert on this- and I only know the basics- but from what I understand there are numbers ranging from 1-9.  The way you get your number is by taking your birthday, including the year, and adding up all the numbers.  For instance, if I was born tomorrow, 09/16/2014, I would figure it out like this: 

9 (the month) + 1 + 6 (the day) + 2 + 0 + 1 + 4 (the year) = 23

Now since there are only numbers 1-9 you have to simplify it even further. 

So since it equaled 23, you would now add:

2 + 3 = 5

Five cannot be simplified any further so if I were born tomorrow I would be a five. 

I went online and found a site called numerology.com and here are some of their definitions of the numbers.  Once you've figured out what number you are- read about it!

And remember, that you can either play off of the positive side of your number AND/OR the negative. 

Here we go: 

Number 1

Positive Characteristics: Individualistic and independent, showing leadership and drive. The 1 is masculine, focused, an originator and self-starter; it is also progressive, strong-willed, courageous, self-reliant and rebellious (in a constructive way). 

Negative Characteristics: 1s can be stubborn, selfish, weak and undisciplined, or a pariah. 

My take: Number 1s can be hard if they aren't careful.  I don't know very many of them, but they kind of scare me.  I think of red-personalities when I think of a 1. They do make good leaders, though! 

Number 2

Positive Characteristics: Sensitive, tactful, diplomatic and cooperative.  The 2s tend to be peacemakers and are loving, studious and patient.  A 2 may express many musical or feminine qualities and also tends to be sensual and intuitive. 

Negative Characteristics: 2s are often discontent and can be seen as spoiled or lazy.  They can be careless, particularly with the truth, but when criticized for their faults are oversensitive. 

My take: Every single 2 I know is a lover.  In our family we call them the lovers because we are just here to love and be loved.  We enjoy staying home and listening to music or crafting.  I consider the 2s cozy people who love to snuggle.  We HATE contention and are slightly co-dependent if we aren't careful. 

Number 3

Positive Characteristics: 3s are imaginative, expressive communicators and artists.  They are tolerant, joyful, optimistic, inspiring, talented, jovial, youthful, dynamic.. the list goes on and on!

Negative Characteristics: For as inspirational as 3s are, there is a price: they are often vain, extravagant and prone to complaining. Intolerance, hypocrisy, impatience and superficiality are par for the course when it comes to the 3s. 

My take: I've dated a couple 3s and they are dang good communicators.  I love that about them.  I don't like that they love being the center of attention, but hey- somebody has go to do it so it might as well be a 3!  I'll just sit on the sideline, thank you. 

Number 4

Positive Characteristics: 4s are disciplined, strong, stable, pragmatic, down-to-earth, reliable, dependable, hard-working, extracting, precise, methodical, conscientious, frugal, devoted, patriotic and trustworthy!

Negative Characteristics: 4s pay for their stability and pragmatism by tending toward the boring side.  This may express itself with a lack of imagination, emotions, empathy. 4s may not bother to put much care into their appearance, and their social awkwardness can make them seem vulgar, crude, or jealous. 

My take: Joseph Smith and Gordon B. Hinckley were both 4s (Or so I've heard!).  So 4s can be really amazing!  They are considered the teacher, but can also tend to be really boring.  I have a hard time with the 4s because I am not a tough-lover and the ones that I know are.  They are super stable and practical.

Number 5

Positive Characteristics: 5s are energetic, adventurous, daring and freedom-loving.  They also tend to be versatile, flexible, adaptable, curious, social, sensual, quick-thinking, witty, courageous and worldly. 

Negative Characteristics: On the flip side, 5s can be unstable, chaotic, self-indulgent, irresponsible or careless.  They should beware the consequences of drug abuse and unhealthy sexual tendencies. 

My take: Well, I married a 5 and so I feel like I know them pretty well.  When I think of the 5s I think of fun. I think of people who want to travel the world.  Cory just can't WAIT to plan vacations and go and do adventurous things. For instance, he is at the skatepark as I am writing. Case in point.  To me, the 5s are freaking fun and have flaming yellow personalities!  They make me get out of the house and enjoy the outdoors, yet they take care of me when I am sick or sad.  My little sister Cam is a 5 and she is one of the kindest people I know!  The dark side of the 5s is they can be selfish.  So be careful!  

Number 6

Positive Characteristics: 6s are responsible, loving, self-sacrificing, protective, sympathetic and compassionate.  These loyal, maternal figures are domestic, fair, and idealistic healers or teachers. 

Negative Characteristics: A 6 can overdo its inherent protectiveness and become anxious, worrisome, suspicious, paranoid, emotionally unstable, cynical or jealous.  They tend toward the conventional side. 

My take: The 6s are considered the parent.  Both of my parents are 6s and I LOVE that about them.  They are both so nurturing and caring and are always watching out for me.  I do wonder, though, if my mom's six-ness has me into the paranoid schitzo that I am!  She'd say to me when I would go somewhere in high school, "Remember that you're no good to me dead!"  Yes. Slightly paranoid, but always amazing. :) 

Number 7

Positive Characteristics:  7 isn't just a lucky number.  It's also spiritual, intelligent, analytical, focused, introspective, studious, intuitive, knowledgeable, contemplative, serious, persevering, refined, gracious and displays much inner wisdom. 

Negative Characteristics: 7s can be aloof, distant, sarcastic, socially awkward, melancholic, cowardly and, when they're at their worst, back-stabbers. 

My take: I don't really have an opinion on the 7s because I don't know much about them. All I know is that I don't seem to have any problems with the 7s in my life. :) 

Number 8

Positive Characteristics: 8s are authoritative, business-minded leaders.  They value control and tend to be powerful, but are also balanced, materially detached, successful and realistic.  They end up in management positions, are efficient, capable, street-smart and good judges of character. 

Negative Characteristics: The dark side of the 8 can be cruel, insensitive, violent, bullish or greedy.  At their worst, 8s can become intolerant religious zealots. 

My take: The 8s tend to be a harder number in general, but I don't know if that's just due to the cruelty in their dark side or what.  I know they can be super successful! 

Number 9

Positive Characteristics: 9s are helpful, compassionate, aristocratic, sophisticated, charitable, generous, humanitarian, romantic, cooperative, creative, self-sufficient, proud, and self-sacrificing. 

Negative Characteristics: 9s can end up being egocentric, arrogant, self-pitying, sentimental, discontent, fickle, cold or mentally unstable. 

My take: The 9s are some of my favorite people.  I dated a 9 for a minute and I loved it because the 9s can do anything. They are super capable and are considered the humanitarian.  People always assume that they can do things and so they get asked to help out a lot!  I can't think of anything bad to say about the 9s that I know. Love them! 

I'm not even kid din you, people, do your number and it probably matches up fairly well!  In our family we have my two parents that are 6s, Adam and Heidi are both 3s, while Lincoln and Rosie are both 7s.  Cory is a 5 and I am a 2.  Alex is also a 2 while Tory is a 7.  Benson and Cambria are both 5s (think world travelers!), and Hayley is a 3.  So, as you can see, we have a lot of the same numbers going on!  With both of my parents being 6s, you can seen why we were all coddled our whole lives.  Still are. 

And just because I have a certain opinion on the numbers doesn't mean that I don't love everyone. :)  I realize that it doesn't work for everyone, but love it anyway! Depending on your number you are more compatible with other numbers.  So, if you are married, try figuring out your spouse's number and see if it helps you understand them a little better! 

This is SO interesting to me!  I love learning people's birthdays so that I can figure out their numbers.  It helps me get some insight on them from the get-go! And NO I do not base all of my opinions on numerology (or do I?? :)), but I do find it pretty FREAKIN' interesting!  What do you think?

If you read this post- post what number you are!  I am interested to know. 

K, I love you all no matter your number.  And let me know if you find this as interesting as I do, or if you just think I'm as nuts as I look in this picture.

Mmmmmkay? Thanks bye.  

Typical Sunday/Bawl Baby

Today has literally been a roller coaster (bolded and underlined to add emphasis!!!) and I just need you people to enjoy these laughs as much as I have.  

Right as we got into the car this morning for church (at 9 am ugh!), Cory turns to me and says, "I had a long black hair coming out of my ear.  Don't worry, I got rid of it.  But, why didn't you tell me??"  As if I'm supposed to notice every hair coming out of his body. Honestly, people, this is how my morning started out (not taking into account the morning breath that I have to tackle every morning. Ewe). 

I died.  I'm like Today is gonna be a good day.  Little did I know what was about to come..

So we are sitting in sacrament meeting (second row from the back thankfully) and the sacrament finally gets to us. 

 Cory says this, "I'm thirsty.  I need to find a cup that is pretty full."  As if with a cup that size any more full is going to make a difference.  

I just kind of smiled and hoped nobody was noticing us.  Then- THEN- after searching for a moment, he finally finds the perfect cup that is just slightly fuller than all the rest (because he's thirsty, you know? :)) and he goes to so-delicately pick it up and it slides between his fingers and spills all over him and the ground.  Guess what I do- burst into laughter mid-sacrament- of course at the most inappropriate time. I was laughing so hard I was shaking and tears were coming down my cheeks!  The look on his face was priceless. This is what I am dealing with, folks.  I am laughing even thinking about it.  Oh, and it all happened right after the toddler behind us screamed, louder than all get-out,  "NO, I'M NOT GONNA FALL ASL..!" And then his mom clasped his mouth.  Let's just say that sacrament was MORE than entertaining today.  

That was that.  Then we went to Sunday school and had a wonderful lesson on talents.  Now let me tell you that I was biting back tears the whole time.  I love participating in class, and I did a couple times, but every time I wanted to I could feel the tears burning at the back of my eyes.  I've been an emotional wreck lately (PMS?).  When we got home from church I watched about 3 episodes of Criminal Minds (that's pretty all we do) and then I tidied up to get ready to go to a family function.  As we were getting ready to leave Cory started wrestling me and teasing me and it honestly was way funny and fun.  I told him how emotional I was feeling and then all of the sudden I was having a full-fledged meltdown right as we were supposed to leave.  I think Corny was stunned to say the least!  And then I started laughing because I had no reason to be crying or any idea why I was crying.  I ask myself every month if this is some dirty trick. ??? I'm telling you- it's been some pretty high highs and some utterly low lows today.  Can anyone relate to me?? I'm feeling a little bit cray cray.

The rest of the day has been great.  Thank heaven.  We had a picnic at the park with his side of the family and played frisbee and Spikeball, our favorites.  It was so nice to enjoy such good company and the wonderful weather that September always brings.  I hate when September ends every year because it is BY FAR my favorite month.  It has a certain glow about it that I look forward to every year. 

After we left the picnic we stopped my parents' house for a little bit and had vanilla shakes that my dad made.  One of my favorite things is when he makes us shakes on Sundays!  Such a cutie- that Davey K! 

Now I sit here and type as I wait for Corny to edit some pictures.  Then we are going to watch some more TV.  Sue us. 

I also wanted to add that I shot my first PAID wedding video yesterday!  I have been getting into videography so that Cory and I could double-book weddings with him as photographer and me as videographer.  I have to admit it was only the third wedding that I've done, but I think it went really well!  I'm gonna make Cory do most of the editing, as I am not very good with stuff like that, but shooting was fun!  I always love being on temple grounds and feeling the wonderful spirit and happiness that is always there.  If you haven't gone inside you should become worthy so you can.  It truly is amazing. 

Their reception was absolutely lovely.  I was exhausted the whole time, but it was a really good experience, and the family was fantastic!  I love working with fun people!  

As the bride and groom were having their first dance I could feel myself start to get a little more emotional than usual, but I pretty much kept myself composed.  Then her dad came and stole her away and danced with her to "Butterfly Kisses" and I nearly lost it.  I turned to Cory as my eyes welled up with tears and I said, "Uh oh!"  as I blinked really fast to make them go away.  THEN her grandpa came and stole her away from her dad and I for real almost bawled.  Get it together- Em.  My heck!  Cory just laughed at me.  But it made me think of my grandpa Robert and all the love I have for him and how I wished he could've been at my wedding.  My dream, my whole life, was to have him seal my husband and me in the temple, but he passed away 9 months before we got married, and only 2 months before I met Cory.  I kept thinking how it would have been to dance with my grandpa at my own wedding.  I hope that bride realized how blessed she was to have him there.  His name was Pappa (at least that's what he told me) and I absolutely fell in love with him.  The cutest little man ever and made sure I was doing okay all night. 

Okay, now I'm getting teary again.  SOMEONE MAKE IT STOP!   I am telling you the water table is mighty high as of late.  

This last week we also had some time to take some pictures and it was really fun.  We haven't taken a lot of time lately to do that and it felt good to get out.  I love being married to a man of many talents. This is me braving the elements once again. Oh, the things I do for him!

We also painted some more furniture this week.  His sister gave us this piece of furniture and it was just brown, but we gave it a makeover and I LOVE how it turned out!  What do you think??

Also, I'm obsessed with our new rug.  I'd been wanting it since we lived in Ohio and finally convinced Cory to let me get it.  It feels like a Golden Doodle.  Love, love, LOVE. 

Oh, and I also found a job this last week.  I am going to be nannying for a family in SLC and they are wonderful! I honestly thought I would die if I had to do another desk job.  So I think this will work out great!  

Anyway.. That is pretty much the update on us.  Even though it's been a roller coaster Sunday for me as far as emotions go, it has also been very peaceful, and for that I am grateful.  I can't wait for General Conference in a just three weeks! 

I hope you've all had a peaceful, family-filled Sunday.  Sundays are my favorite. 

M

I'm BACK! We're BACK! Life as of Late...

I have been in serious mourning these last few weeks because I haven't really had any free time to blog.  What. The. Heck! So this is a post to update you all on the Devenney life and to let you know that WE ARE BACK IN UTAH! (Amen, hallelujah!)

Packing up our stuff was the worst part of moving back.  I had to say goodbye to my very best friend (whom I've been sleeping with since I was 12)-  Mr. Wuggle Devenney.  To say that Corny was elated would be an understatement.  He's been begging me since we got married to get rid of it and I haven't had the wherewithal to part... until now.  When I mentioned that I thought it might be time for Wuggle to meet the garbage can Corny latched onto the idea, AND THEN GRABBED A KNIFE!  I don't know why he hated him so bad.  A wash every six years is plenty! He really was a pain to wash.  When I flew to Utah in June and Cory was in Ohio alone for a week pining for me, he told me that he felt lonely in bed and was going to keep my Wuggle on my side, but then he threw it off because he didn't want to touch it in that middle of the night because he hated the texture.  Come on, babe, aged fleece is WHERE IT'S AT! :) 

 Poor Wuggle Devenney.  May he rest in peace...  If only I knew that Wuggle was safely tucked away in a landfill in Utah instead of Ohio... 

Moving on... The drive back from Columbus was looooooong.  It was a 27 hour drive and I swear Wyoming was 25 hours of it.  Death.  But, we had a good time!  We stopped in North Platte, Nebraska to sleep after our first long day of driving and I've never loved a bed so much.  And a shower.  And a clean toilet.  I should have taken pictures of all the gas station bathrooms I had to use.  Yikes! 

I fell asleep when we left Ohio and was way sad because I wanted to get a picture of this and when I woke up I told Cory and he had gotten it for me.  What a doll! I miss Ohio and all the green it has to offer. 

  

One of my favorite things to do is to take pictures of Corny when he is sleeping. 

He's such a sport for putting up with me.  I can't think of anyone worse to drive with than myself.  I have issues. 

But I'm also a lotta fun!  Can't you tell??

We surprised my parents by coming home a day early and it was a blast!  When we got home only my little sister Cambria was home with our nephew Lincoln.  It was such a treat!  Once my dad got home he and Lincoln helped us unpack.  I adore this boy.. 

Then we headed off to Bear Lake for our annual Killpies and Knudsies vacation!  It was Cory's first time on this particular vacay and we had a blast!  

Oh, how I missed the mountains!  Driving down Logan canyon to find this almost made me teary.  I love Bear Lake, cold and all. 

The water was beautiful and fairly warm this year- which is one of the perks of going in August.  We had so much fun tubing and water skiing.  And, of course, Corny showed us all up with this little trick he had up his sleeve. 

Oh Cory, you're so talented!  (And there I am, all fat.) 

This little ham got caught eating pretzels and Nutella at midnight.  Love him. 

Do you DIE at this picture!?  D-nied! 

This is what we do every night up there.  We all sit around and talk and play games.  

Davey K is in his prime up at the Bear.  He becomes Mary Poppins and brings us all lunch at the beach.

He really is Guy Friday. 

We played lots of frisbee on our get-a-way and we found out that my mom is an all-star frisbee champion.  We got a game of Ultimate Frisbee going one night at the park- Killpies vs. Knudsies- and it was SO fun!  Corny SHINES at sports.  Imagine me being death tired and him always trying to get me to go play with him. Sigh. I never regret it when I do! 

On our last day there Cory was minding his beeswax in the bathroom and a snake slithered out of the wall!  He hurry and finished and then came out and said, "Dave, can I use you for a second??" So as not to scare the rest of us. Which of course sounded just as fishy in itself!  They didn't catch it right off the bat, but my dad went back in later and it was there again and he killed it.  That was the last straw though.  Good thing we left a couple hours later.  

We were all dying though because our sister-in-law, Tory, is DEATHLY afraid of snakes and when we told her, she wouldn't come down from the stairs.  I got this on video but it won't upload.  Sad. 

This would happen to Cory, though.  I still laugh when I think about it.  Had it been me, I would not have been such a sport.  I would've screamed SO loud! 

Once we returned from our lover's tryst we had to begin our search for a place to live and WE FOUND ONE!  We love our little apartment in Draper and are finally feeling like we are getting settled.  Although, it won't last because we'll have to pick up and move again in April.  Yuck.  But we love it.  I think I've gone a little shop crazy.  It's so fun! (Slash slightly stressful.  I hate moving!)

Once we decided where to live we couldn't move in for over a week (my lucky parents!), so we spent that time furniture shopping at the D.I. and Savers.  We are wanting to start up a new business where we give old furniture a make-over and sell it.  I do have to admit that we found some of the cutest things and re-did them.  I am in love!  Has anyone ever heard of chalk paint?? It's expensive, but it is so fun!  We painted two dressers, a vanity, a massive piece of furniture that I don't know what it's called, a side table, and a coffee table.  WE HAVE BEEN SO BUSY!  

I need to go take pictures of our after products and I will blog about them later and you can all tell me what you think.  Deal?

What else have we been up to... Hmmm.  

Well, Corny sold his Mini and got a new car.  

Out with the old! 

In with the new! (And a bang!)

Man it looks good on him!  There is a story behind this car though.  Let me tell you..

Ever since we got married he has wanted to get a Jeep Grand Cherokee, as did I.  But I, being the logical person that I am (NOT) told him that I didn't think it was smart to buy a car right before we left and then have it sit in Utah all summer while we were in Columbus.  He went along with me, but wasn't that happy about it.  

As the summer started to come to an end, I began finding him looking at Jeeps online again.  For hours!  He'd say, "Oh, look at this one!" or "Look, babe, black on black!  What a steal!" or blah, blah, blah.  Finally, one time I said, "Look.  I don't think it is the best move to get an expensive car.  BUT..." and this is where I went wrong, "If you really want it and it is the ONLY thing that will make you happy, then you can get it."  I thought I would guilt him out of getting it.  

BACKFIRE!

He goes, "Awesome!  We are getting it!"

And so we got it. He won.  I lost. That's a first. :) 

He couldn't wipe the smile off his face if he tried.  His look of pure joy made it all worth the wait.  I was in THE worst mood because I'd been shopping at Costco, and Harmons, and Walmart, and Home Depot all day while he tried to find his dream car.  He kept calling as I'm trying to single-handedly push a Costco cart that was overflowing.  Finally I just said, "I'm gonna snap!  Just get the freaking car!" But seriously, he was so cute.  I could've died! 

And am I thrilled now??  Yes.  I love everything about this car.  I named him Sleek. And we dance in it. 

We are so excited to be back and to reconnect with family and friends!  Nothing can ever beat Utah and the beautiful mountains here.  This is our home, and we are so happy. It's dang good to be back. 

M

What's YOUR hair??

Are you a candidate for bangs?

In our family we have lots of experiences and all different colors of hair.  Mine being the nondescript sort of mousy that people don't know what to call. (I call it "jet gray!") Your hair isn't really blonde, but it's not brown... blah, blah, blah. Well does it really matter??  It's blonde.  I think... 

Anyway..  My mom made up a poem (how sweet) about all of the hair going on in our family.  She started this poem when I was about 4 and there were only three children: Adam, me, and Alex- the originals. ;)  She finished it a few years ago once the rest of the pests were here. 

Here it is:

A poem about hair, read if you dare!

Our mother lots of colors she's gotta-

Our father's just plain terra cotta. 

Our first born is known as strawberry tart- 

Our second child is blonde, yet smart. (No duh!)

And as for the Big Old he's peche a la cart! 

Be honest- would you rather text 

or do you really want to know what comes next? 

We had three more and they all turned out blonde-

The boy with the cowlick, of him we're so fond!

A girl came next- "thin and wispy" we say-

then comes "BIG BUSINESS"- get out of her way!

This is the end of our nice little tale-

The stuff on your own head?  Please treat it well! 

Isn't that the most messed up thing you've ever heard?? :)  If you know my family, you will laugh out loud.  Cam really is BIG BUSINESS! Watch out world! 

So as you can see, hair is a big deal in our family.  

My mom married a pre-schooler with fluorescent orange hair parted in the middle (and feathered), and then one time in their late twenties she woke up and he had auburn hair parted on the side. She says it's now transformed into a khaki.  

Davey K. 

How does this happen? I implore! 

And Adam- well he's a creamsicle (which my mom delights to inform all), while Alex is a natural cherry without a stain (aka the same color as our kitchen cabinets).  Do I not sound exactly like my mom??  This is her material. 

Creamsicle- case in point. 

I know it's terrible quality, but it's too good not to share.  I sent a family text on Easter with this picture and said "Happy Easter from the Easter egg head!"  Love the round-brushed look, Ad! 

I once saw a license plate sticker that had a red-head on it and it said "Adopt a ginger"  and I thought of my brothers.  They really are a rare breed...  Love them. 

One time Halle-sue-pie was getting her hair done and she has so much, and it was taking so long, that she just up and fainted! (Or should I say down??) I wish I could've seen that.  Knowing me, I probably would've laughed.  Why do I always laugh at other people's misfortunes.  I hate myself, but not enough to stop. 

Another time my grandma Myrlene told me that I looked like a movie star with bangs and that they totally transformed my face.  At this point I'd already grown them out.  Oh. Em. Gee.. 

My other grandma, Gramma Dorothy, said that Heavenly Father accidentally put her hair line too far back and considers herself a candidate for bangs.  

I think she looks amazing!  And I love seeing her stir that pot of toffee.  It's one of my favorite traditions. 

The story about hair that trumps ALL is when we all got lice!  Can you imagine the hay-day those bugs must have been having in our mops?  I shudder to think of it.  My cousin/half-sister/besty Ray and I would curl our hair and find little bugs on the curling iron and then just brush them off.  It makes me cringe. My head has never itched so bad..  My dad had to give me a blessing and cast them out!  I think sleeping with my head wrapped in mayo was the kicker for me, though.  Can't you just see the scarring that's taken place from that??  Nobody should ever have to do that.  Or boil their combs or have their stuffed animals wrapped up in plastic bags for years on end.  I bet this is what made my hair turn mousy. 

Don't worry, though, peeps, this was a good fifteen years ago, we're all lice free now.  I hope. Thank heaven!

My cousin Rache and I were rock rappelling for girl's camp one year and she had her hair in pig-tails. (Can you see where this is going?)  And one of her pigtails got wound up in the pulley thing mid-cliff and she was just hanging there with her hair stuck.  Luckily, they were able to get it out without having to cut any of it.  But, how scary is that??  Again, I think I laughed at first.  But only until I realized that she was actually stuck, and then I think I almost cried!  Poor Rache.  She's really been tormented. That doesn't stop her from having long hair now though. 

One time in high school we were sitting together at a football game and I felt something tickley down my bum (that's when shirts that didn't cover your plumber's crack were in) and I looked over and HER HAIR WAS GOING DOWN MY PANTS! News flash, Ray!  :) We laughed and laughed!

I was on campus one time and this guy came up to me and asked me what my last name was.  I told him and he said that someone he'd talked to knew a girl from Alta that had long blonde hair.  Then he looked at me and said, "But your hair's not really blonde, but it's not brown..." as he trailed off. The next time I went to my hairdresser I said, "GIVE ME A FREAKING HAIR COLOR!" 

Love that I married a brownie! I hope our kids don't get the mouse look.  

Does anyone have any funny hair stories or mops that they need to vent about??  I tell Corny everyday that I am shaving my head.  It's just too much up-keep!  It's either that or I'm letting the natural gray come in.  It's your choice, babes. 

In other news, we are getting ready to leave Ohio.  My brother and his wife left this morning and to say it's been a hard day would be an UNDERSTATEMENT!  I'm trunkier than all get out.  GET ME OUT OF THIS PLACE!  I WANT MY MAMA! 

One other thing, has anyone ever had an ovarian cyst burst??  What does it feel like?  I want to die. It's 80 degrees outside and I am sitting by my heater in a sweatshirt and pants.  Feeling ill.  Somebody diagnose me and then, for heaven's sake, HELP! 

Love you all. 

M

Victim in the Rag

Two peanuts walked into an alley way.  One was assaulted. 

Speaking of being assaulted, my mom and I were reminiscing the other day about this one time when she was nearly assaulted. 

Here's the story. 

So I was kind of dating someone at the time and he had left my house one night and after he left I went downstairs to my room.  Not a couple minutes had passed when he decided to come back and talk about things, MUCH TO MY SURPRISE (I'm sure it was another DTR.  Boys always liked to torment me into having those)!  But anyway,  my mom didn't know that he had come back and thought that someone was trying to get her, and why wouldn't they?  She's a babe!  She is the reason I've grown up so paranoid.  But THAT is beside the point. :)

Allow me to paint you a picture...  The house was dark and the tile floor ice cold.  My mom in her nightgown (which by this point was a rag due to the fact that she'd been wearing the same one for years and years :)) and I'm sure she was either in tube socks or her crocs and she was scared.  I picture her cowering into a corner, head curled down, with one foot up (almost in a posse) and her hands out trying to brace herself for the inevitable attack (I smile as I write this).   The scene really would have been perfect if the guy I was dating really was going to attack my mom.

Once my friend finally left, my brother Benson and one of my sisters came up to me and told me about my mom's near death experience.  This is when we came up with the next blockbuster movie:

"Victim in the Rag"

Mother of the bride, victim of the groom. 

What do you think? 

Can't you just see it as the next box-office hit??  

Imagine...  Heidi Killpack starring as herself as the one-and-only victim in the rag.  She really should have gone into acting.  Picture the sweet face, of this seemingly benign person, in all these roles she told me they wanted her for, but she had to decline because she was too busy raising kids. :) Can you imagine what I'd be like if I actually believed all the things she told me?!

  

I grew up being told that she was asked to be the wicked witch in "Wizard of Oz" AND the wicked step mother in "Cinderella." (ANASTASIA! DRIZELLA!!!)

This would be her. 

This would be me.  

My mom the movie star? 

Oh, and her new one is that they asked her to be the Trunchbull in "Matilda."  She was even able to convince Tory that this was true.  She makes it that believable. 

WHO ATE MY CAKE??

Would you die?  I can just see her putting people in the chokey:  a place where not even the crows can lay their droppings! 

I can guarantee that you've never met anyone who can laugh on command like she can!  

She's a true class-act that Heidi Killpack.  LOVE YOU MOM, I'M SURE GLAD YOU WEREN'T REALLY THE VICTIM IN THE RAG.  THAT WOULD'VE BEEN REALLY QUITE SAD. 

M